Neil Humphreys: Let's talk about sextets
Liverpool could win a ridiculous six trophies
Liverpool are forcing us into a corner. They are making us talk trophy hauls - in December.
Half the season has passed and Juergen Klopp's metronomes are winning everything, just to annoy us, just so we are left with no choice but to make daft predictions like this one…
They could win the lot this season. Six trophies.
The city that once gave us sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll through the Beatles may give us a sextet through the Reds.
It's a long shot, but Liverpool are exceeding expectations as a matter of routine now so let's examine their sextet chances.
1) THE ENGLISH PREMIER LEAGUE
Unless Virgil van Dijk swops Liverpool for Manchester City in the transfer window and the Reds collapse like a house of cards in a hurricane, that 14-point gap isn't getting bridged.
Klopp's rotations are not only highlighting his squad depth, but also improving momentum.
Liverpool were livelier against Red Bull Salzburg, Bournemouth and Everton.
Naby Keita, Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain, Adam Lallana, Divock Origi and Xherdan Shaqiri have all slotted in seamlessly, showing the collective experience that the likes of Phil Foden lacks at City.
None of Liverpool's replacements are over 30 either, unlike a couple of City's ageing mavericks.
The Reds also find themselves in the enviable position of wanting to win the one that trophy that they are mostly likely to win.
The domestic title drought represents a 30-year-old monkey. Remove that and every other piece of silverware becomes a stress-free bonus.
Prediction: Trophy win. A dentist couldn't close that gap.
2) THE CHAMPIONS LEAGUE
Klopp's fascinating line-up against Salzburg was a classic example of a manager having his cake and eating it. He couldn't lose. With key players rested and restored, Klopp was able to put out a near-best XI for a must-win European encounter.
But the defending champions still played with considerable freedom, knowing that defeat wouldn't be a disaster either. It's the EPL or bust this season.
Europe is almost an optional extra, so much so that the Reds could conceivably swagger towards the final.
Across Europe, traditional heavyweights are wheezing as they struggle to trim the fat.
Barcelona wouldn't fancy going to Anfield again. And the halcyon days of Bayern Munich, Real Madrid and Juventus can be seen only in the rear-view mirror.
Of the four English teams through to the knockout stages, two have new managers and the other is Pep Guardiola's City, the side mostly likely to drop a banana skin.
But the Anfield cauldron remains the most ferocious European venue under the floodlights. The Kop can carry the boys back to their spiritual home.
Prediction: Final. After that, who knows?
3) FIFA CLUB WORLD CUP
There is nothing appealing about this Mickey Mouse trophy, beyond the fact that Klopp would obviously want Liverpool's name on it.
The Club World Cup is the latest trinket to be pulled from Fifa's quagmire of greed and exploitation and dumped in a wealthy state with little interest in football and even less interest in migrant workers rights, the poor souls currently working around the clock to build glassy white elephants.
The Club World Cup semi-final next week - and presumably the final - are reasons why Liverpool must play nine fixtures in December and accelerate their rotations. But there's enough strength in depth to win a rare trophy and return to the silverware that matters.
Prediction: Trophy win. But it's really hard to care.
4) UEFA SUPER CUP
This one sits snugly in the swag bag, following the Reds' triumph against Chelsea in August. So let's move on to the trickiest trophies.
5) LEAGUE CUP
Did you hear the one about the quarter-final that neither side particularly wanted to win?
Wait until next Wednesday morning for the punch line. Aston Villa host Liverpool in a League Cup contest that isn't a priority for either.
Villa are embroiled in a relegation battle and must weigh up the intangible benefits of a cup run against the risk of injuries and exhaustion through the bleak midwinter.
Klopp intends to send out his youth team, while his senior superstars wilt in the Qatari desert. Against a struggling side preoccupied with relegation, the kids should be all right.
Prediction: Semi-final at least.
6) FA CUP
As cups go, the world's oldest is a lottery in every sense. In previous seasons, Klopp has faced criticism from those more appreciative of the FA Cup's storied tradition.
The Champions League triumph put that criticism to bed. But a Wembley day out in the May sunshine would be a fitting end to what promises to be a glorious campaign.
The FA Cup is always entertainingly erratic. A dodgy away draw, the roulette wheel of VAR or even just a cold, tired outing could see Liverpool out of the tournament before the February snow melts.
And, as history shows, Klopp will hardly care less.
Prediction: An early exit - because something's got to give in this mad season, right? Right?!