In sickness and in health: Man takes care of bedridden wife for 30 years

When security guard Pichaymuthu Saloman got home from his night shift on Christmas Day, he sat at the edge of his wife's bed and wished her “Merry Christmas” before gingerly lifting her onto a wheelchair.

The 66-year-old wheeled Madam Saroja Rosalind into the bathroom, where he gently washed her.

Showering his 61-year-old wife is a delicate, 10-minute process but it is something Mr Saloman is accustomed to, after doing it for more than 30 years.

Madam Saroja suffers from stiff-person syndrome (SPS), a rare neurological disorder characterised by constant painful muscle contractions and spasms. There is no cure for the chronic condition that renders her bedridden.

English-language Indian weekly Tabla reported that the couple married in 1984. They have a 37-year-old daughter Cynthia and 36-year-old son Adrian.

Madam Saroja's right eye swelled up in 1990. She was working at a factory at the time.

“The following year, my wife started having cramps in her legs. She experienced immense pain and would scream all night,” Mr Saloman told Tabla.

Doctors could not figure out the cause of the symptoms. It was only in 1995 that she was diagnosed with SPS – the first recorded case in Singapore. 

“Each time she was admitted to the hospital, the bill would come to a few thousand dollars,” said Mr Saloman.

Madam Saroja underwent a hip replacement operation that cost $33,000. Although heavily subsidised, the $14,000 bill wiped out Mr Saloman's Medisave account.

He was then earning $1,800 a month as a storekeeper.

Mr Saloman, who was affected by retrenchment exercises in 1998 and 2001, said: “My wife needed medication to manage the pain. Only with the medicines would she not scream in pain at night."

As her condition worsened – Mrs Saroja also has diabetes – Mr Saloman appealed to the authorities for him to be allowed to hire a maid despite not meeting the minimum required income.

It took two years before the family was granted help. His initial attempts to make claims under the CPF Dependants’ Protection Scheme, which supports members and their families in case of disability and death, were rejected.

Mr Saloman did not shirk his parenting duties despite being his wife's caregiver. He made sure that his children were focused on their studies and not get too affected by Madam Saroja's condition.

The family's situation has improved now that the couple's children are working – Ms Cynthia is a social worker and Mr Adrian is an aircraft technician. 

Madam Saroja also receives outpatient care – including home visits by doctors and monthly replacement of Madam Saroja's feeding tube – from Sunlove Nursing Home, which has about 300 patients under its care.

Mr Saloman, who expressed his gratitude for Sunlove's "timely assistance” over the years, said he had “absolutely no regrets” in his decision to take care of his wife at home.

“There were times I was urged to put my wife in a nursing home and I was even encouraged to take a new wife! But I never entertained these suggestions.”