Home is the scariest place for child abuse victim
For most children, parents are the ultimate protectors, their first source of love and support.
But for Ms Siti (not her real name), now in her 20s, this wasn’t the case.
Ms Siti was just four years old when she was beaten and verbally abused by her father for the first time. It became a haunting routine in her household.
“When my siblings and I were beaten and verbally abused, we didn’t understand why. We would ask ourselves, ‘Did we do something wrong? Did we make him feel this way?’ To this day, I still think about it sometimes,” she shared.
Home was a place of fear, a place she and her siblings avoided as much as possible.
The second child vividly remembers being kicked, whipped with belts and even doused with hot water.
Among the many scars Ms Siti carries, some are physical reminders of the abuse. “When I look in the mirror and see my body, I remember everything that happened,” she said.
Ms Siti and her siblings, now aged between 10 and 30, endured years of torment in silence.
“My parents told us these were household matters and shouldn’t be shared with outsiders,” she explained.
“In school, I couldn’t tell my teachers and friends. I feared my father’s wrath if I spoke about what was happening at home.”
The silence was finally broken when a neighbour, alarmed by the noise of a violent episode, called the police.
“The situation was chaotic, chairs and tables were broken, cupboards overturned,” Ms Siti recalled. “It was evidence of what had been happening for years.”
This intervention marked the turning point for Ms Siti and her family.
With help from Pave, a specialist family violence center, they applied for a Personal Protection Order against her father. Pave also provided counselling and support to the family to recover from the trauma.
Pave head social worker Nazeema Bassir Marican explained that the counselling programme typically lasts from 18 to 24 months.
“We help victims overcome the trauma they’ve experienced. At the same time, perpetrators also receive counselling to understand the harm they’ve caused their loved ones, both physically and mentally,” she said.
Through counselling sessions, safety planning and ongoing guidance, Ms Siti and her family found a path to recovery.
“I’m grateful to the neighbor who made that call. It saved us,” she said.
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